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I don’t do New Year’s resolutions… sorta

ByNicole Doria

I don’t really do traditional New Year’s resolutions anymore.

At least…. not in the “set a big goal on January 1st and feel guilty by January 15th” kind of way. Over the past few years, I’ve found something that feels more aligned, more compassionate, and honestly… more intentional…

I choose a word or phrase for the year.

Not a checklist.

Not a rigid target.

Not a performance metric.

A phrase becomes a lens…. a way of noticing, choosing, responding, and growing. It gives direction without pressure. It holds space for both structure & humility.

I started doing this after I read the book Cultivate by Lara Casey. It was a phenomenal book and I did go ahead to fully dive in with her power sheets afterwards.

This blog is a fantastic resource for the reflection work that I even go into below here.

How to Prepare for a New Year

But here’s why a phrase matters

A word or phrase makes everything just a little more attainable… a little more compassionate when it comes to goal setting. Because let’s be honest… life doesn’t always cooperate with bullet-point plans.

  • Illness happens.
  • Relationships shift.
  • Careers pivot.
  • Faith deepens.
  • Bodies change.
  • Hearts need room to heal.

And what once felt urgent may no longer feel alive.

That’s where a yearly phrase becomes powerful.

A phrase has room to breathe.

It grows with you.

It allows nuance, setback, revelation, and redirection while still gently guiding you back to what matters to you.

Why a Phrase Can Work Better Than Resolutions

No… don’t get me wrong… there’s nothing wrong with measurable goals. But when you’re trying to figure out the big picture… those are things that shouldn’t come into play yet.

Those are the things you can layer in later… after you’ve chosen a guiding word or phrase and built some simple processes to live into it.

The danger with jumping straight to measurable goals… is when your worth becomes tangled up in outcomes. It’s easy to slip into perfectionism… discouragement… or burnout… chasing results while missing yourself in the process. I know this firsthand. One misstep and suddenly you feel like a failure… and nothing good comes from that guilt and shame spiral.

Check this out if you want more on this tension: Perfectionism.

A phrase… guides without grading.

It lets you be disciplined… and kind to yourself at the same time.

It gives you direction… and flexibility.

It becomes a north star… not a scoreboard.

What a Yearly Phrase Can Represent

Your phrase might reflect themes like:

  • Rising into courage and truth
  • Clarifying core values
  • Practicing steadiness and presence
  • Shining with purpose and faith
  • Nourishing what matters… body, spirit, heart, and life

The goal isn’t self-pressure.

The goal is intentional becoming.

This connects closely to the idea of embracing different versions of self and allowing growth to unfold over time, without rigid timelines…. something I explored more deeply here:

Mindset Matters: Versions of Self, Presence & Goals

My Own “Phrase for the Year” Practice

Here’s how this has looked in my life… each phrase shaping a posture rather than a performance goal:

2022 — Arise, Daughter

A year grounded in courage… embodiment… healing… and standing in truth. Rising physically… emotionally… spiritually.

It was very Esther 4:14 for me. And yes… I did the terrifying thing of stepping on a bodybuilding stage for my 40th year. Scared… but determined to rise anyway.

2023 — Core Values

A year of alignment. Asking… do my choices… my relationships… my goals reflect what truly matters… or am I trying to fit into someone else’s mold?

I was healing trauma… learning to nourish my body without dieting… needing direction… needing anchors.

2024 — Rock Steady

A year of steadiness… patience… presence… choosing roots instead of reacting to every storm.

I was learning to walk within the storm… to hold onto peace and calm… to let the eye of the storm become my place to breathe and move.

2025 — Stay Lit + Be Salty

Faith-anchored… inspired by light and salt. Preserving… guiding… shining… staying tethered to God.

Also practical… starting a new photo album… venturing into plants, bread, and dates with myself… staying well-lit inside with daily Bible study.

2026 — Fully Fed

A year of nourishment… body… spirit… heart… relationships… faith… purpose. Not starved… not frantic… not scattered. But rooted… fueled… sustained… intentional.

Inspired by the no-diet movement and by witnessing slow, sustainable growth in others… I want to savor slow moments… not rush through life.

These phrases weren’t about striving… they were about orientation.

They shaped how I made decisions… how I spent energy… what I released… and what I held onto.

How to Choose Your Own Phrase

If this practice resonates with you, try moving gently through these reflections:

1. Reflect on the past year

Where were you stretched… supported… humbled… strengthened… changed?

2. Ask what you need more of or less of

Rest… courage… boundaries… play… stillness… joy… patience?

3. Listen inwardly (and prayerfully, if that resonates)

What word or phrase keeps resurfacing?

Our growth is so often shaped by what we’re exposed to, what we desire, and what we believe is possible… which I unpacked here: Exposure, Desire & Confidence.

4. Let it be broad enough to grow with you

Your phrase should guide… not trap.

5. Keep it visible

Put it somewhere you’ll actually see it…. mirror, journal, phone background.

Then… live toward it.

Not with pressure but with intention.

A yearly phrase also pairs beautifully with long-range vision work like imagining what you want your life to actually feel like five years from now, not just what you want to accomplish.

Goal Setting: How Do You Want Your Holidays 5 Years From Now To Look?

Practical Ways to Live Your Phrase

Define what it means in your own words

Faith… emotions… habits… relationships… how does this word touch your life?

Reflect weekly with gentle questions

What nourished me… what drained me?Where did I show up with intention?Where did I practice compassion toward myself and others?

Let your phrase guide your decisions

Does this move me toward the life I’m growing into… or away from it?

Track themes… not just numbers

Notice patterns of alignment… energy… peace… growth… grounding.

Why This Matters

Life is messy. Seasons change. Bodies and hearts fluctuate. Faith stretches.

A phrase is flexible enough to walk with you… through the messy middle… steady growth… and ordinary sacred days.

A phrase isn’t about performance.

It’s about becoming.

It reminds you to nourish what matters most… live anchored rather than frantic… rooted rather than rushed… guided by intention and grace.

Because becoming always matters more than performing.

And the phrases we choose… year after year… slowly shape the life we’re growing into.

Takeaway: A Phrase Is an Anchor, Not a Rulebook

At the end of the day… choosing a phrase for the year isn’t about fixing yourself… hustling harder… or squeezing your life into a new shape.

It’s about gently orienting your heart… again and again… toward what matters most.

It’s a way of saying:

I want to live awake.

I want to live aligned.

I want to live nourished… not depleted.

Your phrase doesn’t have to be clever… perfect… or profound. It just has to mean something to you… something that steadies you when life swerves… and softens you when you’re tempted to push too hard.

And if your phrase shifts mid-year?

Beautiful… that’s growth too.

This isn’t about performance.

It’s about becoming.

And you are allowed to become slowly… gently… honestly… one aligned choice at a time.

So if a word or phrase keeps whispering to you right now… give it a little room.

See what happens when you live toward it… not with pressure… but with intention.

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