The Next Moment Matters More

Truthfully, every moment matters.

It does. That’s not a good or bad thing. It’s just truth.

In each and every moment we are making decisions for a direction that we are heading. And if you think about it, we are often finding ourselves turning down different ways or traveling down different paths each & every week with our schedule. It’s not always cut and dry. We are often… recalculating.

But that next moment, once we have recalculated… matters more.

OK, I’m gonna drop the GPS talk because yes… I am that person in the car that the GPS has to often redirect because I missed a turn or I wasn’t paying attention or something.

Roll with me on this one…

Right now…

Christmas Eve Eve

It is the eve before Christmas Eve. You are prepping and preparing all that needs to be ready for both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.

You have been managing all of the different social events really well. You have gone into these moments just looking to be present and you were mindful of what was on your plate.

After each event, you got back into your normal groove of things as much as you possibly could, but there were a handful of times when you didn’t have groceries or you didn’t have a chance to meal prep or you just didn’t feel like it. You were tired. There were so many things going on that you just needed a day of rest.

You’ve been able to get in some of your workouts that you had planned for yourself but not all of them. They’re just wasn’t enough time in the day. You have been pulled in so many directions with getting gifts for teachers and the white elephant and getting cookies ready for for the cookie exchange. But you have managed to get into the gym at least once or twice each week.

All the while you have been telling yourself that you just need to make it through this season and then things will get a lot easier. Your schedule will get a lot lighter. You’ll have room for all of those things again.

Does all of this sound familiar?

I thought so… keep rolling with me.

New Year’s Eve

It is now New Year’s Eve. You have made it through Christmas and all of the multiple Christmases that that entailed with different family and friends. You have eaten through all of the leftovers because you didn’t wanna waste any of it. It is cold and it has been hard to move, but you are ready and raring to take on, all the things that were put to the side because you didn’t have enough time. I mean it’s New Year’s after all it’s time for a new year, new you! And this year is going to be the year that you make it all happen with how you want to look and feel and live.

Time for one last hurrah!

You prepare and ready all the things for New Year’s night for a celebration to close out this year. You’re already starting to feel a little off because you haven’t been eating the way you normally do but it’s just one more day. And it’s a celebration. We have to celebrate, this year is over and this year almost killed us.

Still sounding familiar?

Keep following…

January 2nd

It is now January 2. Yes, the second. There was a lot of food, maybe some drinks, and very, very little sleep so January 1 was not the day… January 2, however… Now we’re gonna make it happen.

So if we’re gonna make it happen… We have to do the thing that we have been dreading this whole time. It’s time to step on the scale and see the damage that has been done.

Now this is the variable of variables. You might see a number and you might be excited that you made it through because you are looking back at all the things that happen during the last three or four months and…. “whew!” is the one thing that comes out of your mouth. And now you might see a number that does not excite you because you have come to that “Come to Jesus” moment of how much that season really did to you with all of the parties and all the exchanges and all the not wanting to waste food or offend somebody by saying no to a slice of pie or a cookie

All of this… It didn’t have to be that way. You didn’t have to get yourself to this moment.

There was a handful of things along the way that you could do that would’ve been effortless.

Be Real With Yourself

First and foremost, you could’ve said to yourself… I am going to do what I can when I can and no matter what the outcome is I knew that I did the best that I could in that moment.

You cannot always control your outcomes and their timelines. You can, however, control over processes and these processes will help you avoid a more intense outcome that you may not like.

However, you’re never gonna see what that is because you’re actively avoiding it.

Maybe when you stepped on the scale, you were up 5 pounds BUT you were mindful in different moments and instead of indulging even after celebrations when you didn’t necessarily want to you made some of your basics that are easy to make the worst of days. These basics are not as flavorful as the meal you had the night before BUT… They get the job done. It’s all about balance, right?

Now in this scenario…. You didn’t see the extra calories that you possibly could’ve had from continuing the celebration food afterwards instead of going back to your staples that you know help your body feel energized and strong. Who knows how many extra pounds you saved yourself in those moments!

If you’re really curious on what one meal can do… Take a look at some of the nutrition information out there for some of the different restaurants. One plate can easily be 2000-3000 kcals and not really look like it’s going to add half a pound to a pound of weight to your body.

So that’s why I said you gotta be real with yourself… don’t live in the disillusion that your next choice doesn’t matter. You can definitely have indulgences. But balance it out if that is what’s going to matter to you in the month or two from now.

Your past self isn’t the problem. Your present self is.

Stop Throwing Around Mindful

This one here… good gravy! I cannot even begin to stress how much this terminology is thrown around like it means something completely different than it actually is.

Being mindful doesn’t mean that you’re just grabbing something out of the fridge and throwing it into your mouth and then moving onto the next task. Taking a moment to look at what is in the fridge and trying to make a decision on what is going to hold you over in the best way possible is being mindful.

Adding party after party after party to your schedule as well as a bunch of to do and tasks IS NOT being mindful. Carefully assessing your time and your capacity IS.

Knowing your limitation and knowing that you want to be present in all of these different moments IS.

Assessing things and pulling back in areas so you can push in on others IS being mindful.

Heading to a party with a desire in mind to do certain things so that you do not repeat the year prior IS being mindful.

Reflecting on how everything went after the party to see what was feasible and what was not before you had to the next one IS being mindful.

Mindfulness is paying attention to what your body is telling you in different moments and honoring that in the best way possible so that the next moment is more aligned with who you want to be.

Now with all of this thought… have you really been mindful?

Maybe you have… Maybe you did so much better this year than you did last year, but it still wasn’t in full alignment to who you wanna be… guess what? That’s amazing. You lived more in your own personal truth than you did the year before. No matter what outcomes happen… It’s going to be better than the last year.

Balance Your Mess Out

When you start to look at your schedule and you feel overwhelmed, start to say “no”.

“No.” Is this magical word that is actually a full sentence when you put a period at the end.

And yes, I am totally being a sarcastic so-and-so at the moment I am a recovery schedule filler because my children will need all the memories in the world of all of the grand traditions and parties and things that we did. I need to do it all and I need to do it all now because time is precious and it’s limited and I only have so many Christmases with them. Sound familiar?

Do you wanna know what kids see in most of those moments… How stressed mom was? … How tired mom was? … How busy life was? … How life is supposed to be? … How you’re supposed to give to everybody else but not allow yourself to rest? … How you’re supposed to take care of yourself when other people offer you an invitation? … How much you’re supposed to complain during the most merry and joyful time of year because of all the things that you have to do that you were never actually required to do?

Did I strike a nerve?? I did with myself a handful of times going through those. I do all of this too. I did all of this too.

Learn to slow it down. Balance out the mess with time that there’s nothing in the schedule. Actually schedule nothing if you need to so that you don’t put something else in that spot. Allow yourself to replenish. Allow yourself to make some food. That’ll keep you going during the busyness. Allow yourself to go for that walk outside and just take in the snow, the animals, the sun…. Whatever it might be. Feel the air in your lungs.

We don’t have to wait till January to focus on ourselves. because by then we’re probably too burned out and frustrated to even start.

There’s Still Time

It is Christmas Eve Eve… and I just came into your world like the voice of Christmas past, present and future.

You still have time.

You can still take a moment to be real with yourself and what you’re going to do with all of the leftovers instead of consuming them yourself to not waste food. Which will more than likely leave you not feeling well for a little while longer because you’re not eating your normal things. You can eat what fuels your body to give you energy to use that energy with your loved ones. You don’t have to just eat what’s there.

You can work to practice real mindfulness. You can slow it down and assess your body. You can assess your body’s need and wants. You can strategize. You can see what is truly going to be more aligned with who you want to be tomorrow, next week, next month… 5 years from now. it sounds like a lot to think about, but it’s really not. This is more about just knowing who you are and knowing who you wanna be…. And just making small little tweaks to get you there. One less drink at a party. One less dessert. You’ve already done it.

You can work to balance out your mess. you can schedule rest. You can turn around and tell somebody that you’re not gonna attend. You can tell them that and then go to the gym. And even if you post a selfie on Instagram, you don’t have to feel upset about that. Because you just did something thing for you and that will help pour into your loved ones…. From the overflow… Not from what’s in your cup that you need.

I hope this helps

There’s still time

With love, Coach Nik